Merry (Is It?) Christmas

You know what really pisses me off about this time of year? The fucking Christmas music. The same old crap every year. Could someone please come up with new songs? Or better yet… Do away with it completely. If I have to hear “Jingle Bells” one more time, I’m going to lose my shit.

Earlier this week, I had to go do some grocery shopping (shopping anxiety level, 10/10) . When paying, I asked the teller whether they have baseball bats. They didn’t. Probably better that way. I had the genius plan to go smash the speakers. Plan ruined. Damn. The teller thought my plan was hilarious though and gave me a high five. Anxiety level, 5/10. You’re awesome teller lady!

Fast forward to today. I don’t even know what today actually is. I’m in my own little bubble. The dad and stepmom went away for the day (I’m hoping they’ll stay overnight wherever they are). Uncle is on his own mission. I went for lunch with Jasmine and her family.

Now I’m alone (with my non Christmas music). Did some reading and took a nap (thank you Xanax) with my two comfort items. The stuffed bear that Jasmine gave me, and my therapy jacket. I miss my therapist way too much. Took some photo’s of useless things. It doesn’t help that I’ve been feeling sick the whole day. Lost an hour somewhere. Where the hell does that time go? I should invest in a camera when I get a job again. I’d love to see what happens during these times.

To everyone who celebrates it, Merry Christmas to you.
And to those that don’t, and find this a painful and difficult day, I’m sending you hugs.

I’m ending this now. Going to go crash someone’s Christmas party in a Halloween outfit.

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