Stranger In This World

This is something I wrote on the 15th March 2016, and stumbled upon today. It applies just as much now as it did back then.

Where do I belong?

Why do I have this constant yearning to be anywhere but here?

People call places home. I haven’t yet found my own. Does that place even exist? Or is there a deep internal resistance to anywhere I find myself? A subconscious element I don’t have access to?

Staring out the window. The moonlight casts slivers of light through the dark trees beyond. It looks different today. Is home perhaps somewhere out there?

And sometimes I wonder…
Do I even exist in this world?


16 responses to “Stranger In This World”

  1. That’s how I felt when I first left my husband back in 2012 and moved to Austin. I felt out of place, lonely and it was strange because isn’t Austin supposed to welcome those who felt out of place. I thought I’d just fit right in with them. My whole life I’ve felt like I didn’t belong as if I were in limbo with nowhere to call home. Now I’m back where I started. The state I was born and raised…and I feel more lost than ever.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. If you can find a place of home within your own heart that is the only true home. I feel like this so much and when I was going to AA meetings nearly every single person in recovery spoke about feeling the same way. I think if you are a deeply sensitive emotional person there is an awareness such as the Gnostics had of this being a kind of prison place far from the unconditional love of heaven. Maybe we need to form a community of those who feel like we do as we do on here, maybe there will always be a part of us that feels this way especially if its a strong imprint of how we felt when we were young.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You are not at all alone in your aloneness, in the sense of being outside of things. Major philosophers (for example, the German philosopher Heidegger) talk about this a great deal. The game, however, isn’t over for you. As emergingfromthedarknight suggests above, one must first become comfortable in one’s own skin. (I am not encouraging that you read Heidegger BTW, since his prose is difficult even for philosophers!).

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks… It helps knowing I’m not alone in this. Working towards being comfortable in my own skin isn’t an easy feat, but I’m confident I’ll get to that place. Okay, I’ll stay away from Heidegger. 😛

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Shared this one… It expresses so much without the need for long explanations. Hitting me hard right now. Thank you – I’m finding people that can relate and it’s helping me hold on to some hope ❤


    • Thank you for the share, and for your comment. This is a wonderful community, and it also helps me see that I’m not the only one suffering. It’s sad to know that so many people feel the same way though. Keep holding onto hope. 🙂 ❤

      Liked by 1 person

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