Too Much

Too much pressure.

Too much pain.

Anxiety. Worry.

One shock after another.

One of my friends recently told me that I seem to have the worst luck. Ha!

I try so damn hard. I try to be positive. And for what?

For everything to blow up in my face anyway? For things to continually go wrong? What’s the lesson? Is there even one?

It shouldn’t be this hard. All. the. time.

Why can’t I give my life in exchange for that person I love who’s fighting for his? People need him. They don’t need me. I don’t want to be here anymore.

It’s like shouting into the wind. No answers. No comfort. Just emptiness and silence.

7 thoughts on “Too Much

  1. You’re right that it shouldn’t be that hard all the time, and some people tend to be magnets for bad luck. I disagree that you’re not needed though, I’m sure this person who you love (and who loves you) values you greatly.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I have begun to experience resulting peace and joy from not resisting what is and even if it may not be so acting as if I am grateful for my difficulties and challenges and speaking and writing-Thanks for sharing Rayne I am with you on another level hoping, wishing and praying for your finding your answers

    Like

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