Tag: Despair

• Dear Agony

  I can’t turn the rain into sun anymore.

  Rayne

  March 7, 2017

  Depression

  Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, Broken, Despair, Music, Suicidal Ideation

• Heavy

  My legs give way beneath me. My heart is heavy. Switching back and forth between sadness and depression. I can’t get up. The pain is unbearable. I need to stay on the floor for a little while longer, and let the waves wash over me. I can’t fight right now. I need to get my strength […]

  Rayne

  March 6, 2017

  Depression

  Depression, Despair, Resilience, Sadness

• It’s So Dark

  For the past week, I’ve been depressed most of the time. I can’t seem to shake it. I don’t even know where I am sometimes. I’m in a constant state of exhaustion. Feeling disconnected from everyone. I just want to be alone. It’s like someone else is living in my head, my body. Empty one […]

  Rayne

  December 26, 2016

  Depression

  Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, Darkness, Depression, Despair, Disconnection, Dissociation, Emptiness, Exhaustion, Feeling Lost, Feeling Stuck, Fragile, Hopelessness, Hurt, Life, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Numb, Suicidal Ideation, Tired, Vulnerability

• Fighting For Air

  This time of year, I feel the grief of everyone I have lost through the years. Too many people. Some gone too soon. Others leaving a broken heart in their shadows as they walk away. Tonight is one of those moments of intense grief. Memories drifting through my mind. The pain and hurt proving that I’m […]

  Rayne

  December 14, 2016

  Depression

  Abandonment, Anger, Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, Broken, Depression, Despair, Goodbye’s, Grief, Hurt, Life, Loss, Memories, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Missing Someone, Overwhelmed, Relationships, Sadness, Suicidal Ideation, The Past

• Protected: Already Missing Her

  There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

  Rayne

  December 7, 2016

  Therapy

  Abandonment, Anxiety, Attachment, Bond, Borderline Personality Disorder, Boundaries, BPD, Connection, Depression, Despair, Fear, Fear Of Abandonment, Fragile, Goodbye’s, Hurt, Idealization, Life, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Missing Someone, Nightmares, Object Constancy, Obsessive Attachments, Psychologist, Relationships, Sadness, Skills, The Therapeutic Relationship, Therapist, Therapy, Therapy Break, Trust

• Interview Panic Sets In

  I have an interview with one of my agents tomorrow (who I haven’t met in person yet). He put my resume forward for a position at a relatively large company. The company expressed interest, but I first need to have an interview with my agent tomorrow. If he thinks I’m a good candidate for the job, […]

  Rayne

  November 28, 2016

  Borderline Personality Disorder

  Anxiety, Black & White Thinking, Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, Confusion, Depression, Despair, Fear, Feeling Stuck, Hopelessness, Insecurity, Life, Meltdown, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Overwhelmed, Panic, Work