Did a photo shoot for some friends. Wasn’t up for it. Depressed. Did it anyway. They seemed to be having fun. I was on autopilot. Tried to have fun. It wasn’t happening. Went out for coffee with them afterward. Felt empty. Could barely talk. Good thing they seemed to be talking among themselves enough forContinue reading “Alone”
I don’t always have the words to express my feelings. During such moments, I either find a song to represent how I’m feeling, or I make collages in Photoshop such as this one. I search for images that relate to how I’m feeling. Images that I connect with on a deep level, and then add someContinue reading “Emotion”
I’ve gone and done it again. I got attached to someone else. My psychiatrist. When I first met her, that Friday that I booked myself into the clinic, I can’t remember most of our interaction. I saw her four more times after that, and didn’t know what to make of her. So there wasn’t anContinue reading “Attachment: Here We Go Again”
On Thursday morning I was reading something on the internet, when I started to feel uncomfortable. All of a sudden, that feeling erupted in a full on trigger. I immediately turned into a mess. I became that 14-year-old who had just been broken by someone she had looked up to and trusted. Images and emotionsContinue reading “Never Thought I’d Be Here – Part One”
For the past week, I’ve been depressed most of the time. I can’t seem to shake it. I don’t even know where I am sometimes. I’m in a constant state of exhaustion. Feeling disconnected from everyone. I just want to be alone. It’s like someone else is living in my head, my body. Empty oneContinue reading “It’s So Dark”
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