Broken Hearts

If you’re reading these words…

I wish I could take your tears away. I wish I could take away your hurt.
I need you to know, that just because I wasn’t crying, didn’t mean I didn’t feel anything.

I felt so much inside. I felt it all. I still do. I just didn’t know how to release it without falling apart. You say that I don’t always have to be the strong one. But I wanted to be strong for you. I still do. But the truth is, I’m not all that strong. And I’m so sorry.

When I first met you, I didn’t know that you would become my deepest love. You crept into my heart and became my world. I won’t forget how it felt to have your hand in mine. How it felt to kiss you and lie in your arms. To hold you in mine.

When you held onto me this morning as we said goodbye, I didn’t want to let go. I wanted to beg you to stay with me, and for things to remain the same. I hoped that I would wake up and realize it had just been a nightmare. But it isn’t, is it? I didn’t ask you to stay and come back with me. Because I knew we are doing the best thing for us both. But that doesn’t make it hurt any less. Watching you walk away, broke through every defense I had.

No one is to blame. Time just wasn’t on our side. The connection we share will never fade away. Time can’t take that away from us. I’ll never give up on you. I’ll always be close.

You’re my best friend. My soulmate. I love you. Forever.

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23 thoughts on “Broken Hearts

  1. So very sorry to read of this. Please reach out for support from those nearby, your therapist, and those in your blogging community as you have here.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh Rayne, my heart goes out to you (and not in a condescending way – literally, please, picture my heart reaching out to yours, and giving whatever warmth and love and comfort it can). This is so, so, so painful, and it’s okay to sit with that. It’s okay to fall apart – because if you fall apart, you have people to catch you (your friend, your therapist, your blogging community). And in no way does having people to catch you make the pain less real – it shouldn’t, because this is a pain that demands (and deserves) to be felt and worked through. But I just want you to know you are not alone. You are loved. ❤ xx

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Thank you so much! Your comment brought tears to my eyes. It’s so beautiful. We’re going to stay as friends… And even though it’s not the same, it’s better than not having her in my life at all. But it’s still a change, and so damn hard. Thank you again… You’re such a beautiful soul. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

        1. Hi. 🙂 I’m feeling okay thanks. I have my moments though. Rollercoaster emotions. Jasmine and I went to a beautiful public garden yesterday. It’s nice that we’re still friends. I’m glad we still get to be in each others lives, albeit in a different and limited way. Thanks for caring. ❤

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          1. I am so glad you got to keep a friendship.. When I broke from my ex what hurt most was that the entire relationship was cut, no resolution on either side and out of each other’s lives for good including his beautiful dog, Sally who I loved. This must ease your heart a little though I imagine its still painful. ❤

            Liked by 1 person

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