About an hour ago, I had a terrifying experience… All in my head of course. I had just come back from an incredible date with my girlfriend, and I was sitting outside on my balcony. All of a sudden, I felt this presence with me. There was no one there, but something didn’t feel right. The next minute, I saw his face. The face of the step cousin that stole something from me. My body. My soul. Someone I looked up to, someone I trusted. I haven’t spoken out about this on my blog yet. I’m still not entirely comfortable talking about it, so I don’t want to go into that right now.
But for the sake of making this post make more sense, I thought I would at least mention a tiny bit of it. The morning after, him and my other step cousin were sitting on the stairs. They looked at me, with these evil smiles and expressions on their faces, and that was the last thing I remember. I lost an entire year of memories after that. All I know is I never told anyone about this until I was in my early 20’s.
For as long as I can remember since that event, I couldn’t remember the details of this particular cousin’s face. But tonight, I saw it so clearly. As if I he was right there and I was actually looking at him. I could feel him. This was different to one of my ‘normal’ flashbacks, because I was aware of where I was, and that he wasn’t really there. Yet, it still felt real at the same time. Sort of like two worlds colliding. I was terrified, and wanted to run. Where to, I have no idea.
I have my weighted blanket wrapped around me right now, so I feel calm enough to write this. But I feel sick. I don’t understand what happened there. I was in such a good mood, and then out of the blue this happens. And what the hell was this?
The worst part is that it doesn’t want to go away. I can still see his face. I just want to hide.